DCO-Supporting LGBTQ Individuals in Creating Positive Listening Space

There are many reasons why people may develop emotional or psychological problems during their lives, but LGBT people face particular challenges. Negative attitudes, discrimination and violence can contribute to mental and emotional distress for LGBT people. For trans people, transition itself can be stressful with many barriers to be overcome. Coming out can also be emotionally tough with many people having to deal with rejection from family and friends, and bisexual people face a unique stressor in coming out to partners or potential partners. Staying in the closet can also be stressful, leading to isolation and fear of discovery for some people. Bisexuals may experience the double closet, hiding their same-sex attractions from heterosexual friends and family and their other-sex attractions from gay and lesbian communities. Bisexuals may also experience social pressure to identify as either gay or straight. All of these stressors have a profound impact on the self-esteem and self-identities of LGBT people and studies show that LGBT people suffer from depression, anxiety and suicide at higher rates than the general population.

LGBT people are more likely to be physically and verbally victimized than the general population. This is especially true for those who do not fit gender norms, such as the gay man who is effeminate or the lesbian who is butch. For trans people, the dangers are even more extreme. A 2004 Statistics Canada study showed that compared with heterosexuals, the odds of being victimized were nearly 2 times greater for gays and lesbians and 4.5 times greater for bisexuals. LGBT youth also experience high rates of bullying and harassment in schools.

Michael Skynner presents a very open and informative session that outlines the various terms related to sexual orientation and gender identity and helps in our understanding of the LGBTQ community. He emphasizes the importance of being knowledgeable, accepting and non-judgemental when speaking with people who call the distress/crisis helpline. Michael provides concrete suggestions for creating a positive listening space for distress/crisis line callers and encourages the helpline call responder to make no assumptions and to allow the caller to define him or herself. Michael is a social worker, working within a family services agency, and he shares his knowledge and expertise from his many years of experience in the field of counselling through this video presentation.

Glossary of Terms: Positive Space: Positive Space challenges heterosexist principles that exist in society and exposes the imbalances that are present within our infrastructure exposing a binary between heterosexual and those who self-identify as LGBTQ. The utilization of Positive Space takes an already dominated space, influenced by an ideology (heterosexism) challenges it and offers alternative ways to live in our society, rather than the singular notion of heterosexism which could be non-existent with the creation of inclusive policies.

Heterosexism: A belief that everyone is or should be heterosexual; Societal/ Cultural, institutional, and individual beliefs and practices that assume that heterosexuality is the only natural, normal, acceptable sexual orientation

Homophobia: An irrational fear or hatred of people who identify as homosexual. This fear may stem from the out-of-date belief that homosexuality is a mental illness, from personal religious beliefs about the post mortem fate of homosexuals, from the incorrect belief that homosexuals are responsible for AIDS, etc.

Biphobia: Biphobia can be defined as a fear or dislike of people who do not choose to identify as either heterosexual or gay/lesbian that is, people who do not identify as at one or the other end of the dichotomy.

Transphobia: prejudice, discrimination, and gender-related violence due to negative attitudes toward transgender identity

Internalization of Homophobia, Biphobia or Transphobia: Self-hatred of one’s own identity as a result of “believing,” or accepting as true, the negative stereotypes of one’s identity.

Queer: a word used by some interchangeably with LGBTQ and also meant to be inclusive of those who don't align themselves with traditional notions of gender, transsexual or transgender. Though it has become popular in some (usually predominately white) academic settings, not all LGBTQ folks are comfortable "reclaiming" the word and some find it offensive. Some see it as more inclusive that LGBTQ. Some see it as confrontational, exclusive, or problematic for other reasons

Questions for Further Consideration As a call responder working on a distress/crisis line, it is important to be aware of your own beliefs and attitudes, and any assumptions or preconceived ideas you have that may interfere with your ability to do your best when assisting others. How can you help yourself be more prepared for your work as a helpline worker? Take the time to examine your own beliefs and attitudes when it comes to individuals with a diverse sexual orientation than your own. Do you view all people as equal or do you feel a reservation when it comes to accepting others? Imagine yourself in the place of the caller. What would you hope to hear and experience as part of the call. How can you be as sensitive as possible in order to provide the caller with a feeling of care and acceptance?

Can an extended silence of a call responder on the phone helpline be interpreted as a negative thing by the caller?

If a caller has identified him or herself as a gay, lesbian, bisexual or a trans person on a distress/crisis line, they may have taken what could feel like a very courageous step on their part, to disclose this personal information to the call responder. A lapse of time in responding to the caller, could indicate to the caller a lack of acceptance or understanding. Consider how important it is to acknowledge what a person has shared with you and the need for a caring, helpful response. Remember that acknowledgement and awareness can be signs of showing support.

Creating a positive listening space is an important thing for a distress/crisis line worker to do for all callers. What is it you do on a regular basis that helps to ensure that you work towards creating a positive listening space for all callers on the helpline? How does this apply specifically to calls with a focus on LGBTQ issues?

A conversation is made more challenging when one makes assumptions. Seek clarification, explore and try to understand fully. Use inclusive language and reaffirm to the caller that the service is a supportive one. Use a tone of voice that transmits a sense of safety for the caller. Follow the caller’s lead and let them proceed at their own pace. Reflect and be aware of the techniques you use to help a caller feel more comfortable and reduce the stress or anxiety they may experience when making that call to the distress/crisis line.